Future Ted mentions the time new upstairs neighbors moved in, and proceeded to have loud sex on a regular basis (cleaned up as “playing the bagpipes” for his children). He had to deal with this distraction as his friends dealt with couple troubles. At MacLaren’s, Barney worries about Lily and Marshall breaking up after witnessing Marshall clean a dish at Lily’s request. He explains that he would never give into a demand he didn’t care about (playing out several sexy scenarios with an imaginary Lily), and that he and Robin never fight. In fact, both of them pathologically avoid fighting (Barney simply leaves, while Robin gets naked). They leave for a skiing trip, and Marshall, heeding Barney’s awful advice, decides to tell Lily he won’t immediately wash his dishes.

She promptly kicks him out after Marshall’s incoherent arguing escalates into several separate issues. After a slapbet-induced slap, Ted gladly lets Marshall stay at his apartment. While Lily and Marshall fight, Ted observes that Barney and Robin are acting suspiciously romantic, as if they were the perfect couple. After another night of listening to his upstairs neighbors “bagpipe,” he goes to their door to confront them, only to find they are very old. However, he does take his experience as a method to find out what’s going on with Robin and Barney. He confronts them at the bar with a secret weapon: Barney’s downstairs neighbor. The man’s presence makes them admit that they fight often. It all began after being stuck together on a ski lift during a disagreement (preventing them from leaving or having sex).

They had perpetrated the charade because they felt bad about being ineffectual at being a couple, which they confess to Lily and Marshall. As Robin and Barney describe their violent and frequent fights, Lily and Marshall start to appreciate how calm their own relationship is, and forgive each other immediately. Robin and Barney are perplexed by the mutual surrender, claiming that someone always has to “win” an argument.

“Bagpipes” is the sixth episode of the fifth season of the CBS situation comedy How I Met Your Mother, first airing on November 2, 2009.

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